i have an addiction....

Hey all, I have something I need to confess.... 

I'm sorry, I know I always do this.

 I know this is a bad habit, I know it can be annoying and even jarring.

But yet, I still return to this habit almost every month.

And it's back again...

I changed my blog's aesthetic once again.

So yes, we have a new look and it is by far my favorite! 

All of the quotes in my header are from Shakespeare, because, well, Shakespeare

It's also funny because I feel like I've been blogging longer than just a year and a half, time flies, my friends. 
But seriously, I am sorry if this is getting annoying, I just really love playing around with graphics and sometimes I come up with something I like better. 

However, I'm still sticking to the floral theme, I really like the whole vibe, my room's theme is also roses and more victorian which I really love. 

Anyways, please let me know what you think! 

Happy Writing,


Book Recs: Books with Mental Illness Reps

As y'all probably know I love to read, and I read a good amount of books because I'm a fast reader.  This year I am trying to read 300 books, so far I've read 185 books out of that goal, so I'm not sure if I'll make it, but I'm going to try (follow me on goodreads here if you want to see everything I read).

    Anyways, I read a lot of different genres and I also get a lot of emails from people asking for recommendations and since the school year is starting and it gets harder and harder to find time to read and you don't want to waste your time on 'meh' books, I thought I should start another series asides from my The Problem with YA series.

     And that series is Book Recs: ____ , where I give a bunch of book recommendations for books that fit into a certain topic or genre! Am I going to continue this series? I don't know, depends on if y'all like it or not.

      This month's recs are books with characters with mental illnesses.

       I think reading about mental illnesses is so important because it helps people have empathy for others and to educate themselves on topics such as mental health, also I think more people with mental illnesses should be able to find themselves in books. So let's get into it!

 (All more content filled book titles will be in bold so my more conservative readers or readers who want to avoid things like crudeness and swearing will be aware, and I am happy to give a brief content summary in the comments if you ask me).

How to Disappear by Sharon Huss Roat//Social anxiety rep

Memories of Summer by Ruth White//Schizophrenia rep

Kiss of Broken Glass by Madeleine Kuderick//Self-harm rep

Damsel Distressed by Kelsey Macke//Depression

Stolen by Lucy Christopher//Stockholm syndrome 

Forgive Me, Leonard Peacock//Depression + suicidal behavior

Songbird by Lisa Samson//Depression

All the Bright Places by Jennifer Niven//Depression + suicidal behaviour

Highly Illogical Behavior by John Corey Whaley//Agoraphobia 

Whisper to Me by Nick Lake//Schizophrenia

Eliza and Her Monsters by Francesca Zappia//Social anxiety

Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell//Social anxiety

I just want to add a trigger warning for these, if you struggle with any of these illnesses and books about them might set you off, do not read them. Please keep your mental health in mind and stay safe and take care of yourself.💛💛💛

Have you read any of these books?
Do you have any books to add?
What Book Recs do you want to see next?

Happy Writing,


The Problem with Christian YA Books

I've held back from posting this one because someone always gets offended when I criticize anything Christian, but you know what?

That's ridiculous. 

It's not sacrilegious to criticize something with the label "Christian", I am not going to not criticize the problems and stereotypes that happen in these books just because it's supposedly "Christian", I have a brain for a reason, I like to think things over before blindly agreeing and following.   

So here we go.

And for the record, I'm not saying that all Christian books are bad, I've read some really good ones, but I've noticed a lot of problems in a lot of Christians books as well, and the fact that they claim to be Christian should not lower the standards for them.

First off, in the wise words of Jordan Taylor:

I am very very tired of reading books and halfway through it's like, oh, btw the characters are Christians. Ummm, well, I have very bad news for your characters: they're the definition of lukewarm Christians (Revelation 3:15-16).  I've read lots of books that do this, and it is so frustrating. One time I was reading this book and I already didn't like the main girl character and then halfway through the book, she thinks something along the lines of, "That wouldn't be very Christian of me." *crickets* I'M SORRY, BUT IF YOU'RE THE MAIN CHARACTER, YOUR BELIEFS SHOULD PROBABLY NOT BE A PLOT TWIST. 

On the flip side of this, we have the really preachy books.

The really really preachy books.

The kind of books that make me want to ask: Are you writing a story or a sermon?  

Look, sharing the message through your stories is amazing and so is having Christian characters, but even themes of Christianity can be (dare I say it?) overused in fiction. God is powerful, his word is powerful, to be perfectly blunt, you cannot capture his power in a bunch of paper and ink.

Stop trying to. 

Even the Bible itself points out how impossible it is to write the greatness of God down: Jesus did many other things as well. If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written.-John 21:25  

Just, K.I.S.S. 

Keep it simple, stupid. 

Sometimes a little subtlety is the best. We don't need a 400-paged sermon shoved down our throats disguised as a YA novel, just give us something real. Show us the joy and hope that the Lord can bring throughout your story. 

Don't have unrealistic characters that quote bible verses and say prayers every other sentence while being pretty much perfect, have broken people who actually have to seek God constantly. 

Also, don't just focus on a moral or religious plotline without adding character arcs or a plot at all!! I repeat, you are writing a story, not a sermon!!!*

**although if you are, that's totally cool, just don't pretend it's anything more or less than a sermon or a Lamplighter book, either way. 

In the end, I don't care if the book has a blue cross sticker slapped across the front of it, it can still be empty trash like so many of the other books in YA.  

The other day I was talking to one of the elders at my church and we were talking about books and Tolkien came up and we started talking about how Tolkien approached religion in his books.

 He believed in being subtle, even going so far as to criticize his friend, C.S. Lewis's works for being too obvious with the religious symbols and having too strong and in-your-face Christian themes. It was also said that he thought that any good story wouldn't need strong themes to point to God and that if the story was any good it would automatically point to God without having to be directly religious. 

And as of now, I'm inclined to agree.
Other posts in this series:

Welp, I tried to do that without offending anyone, did it work? 
What are your thoughts?

Also, I know I have a pretty 50/50 split on Christian and non-Christian readers on this blog, so I'm sorry to my non-Christian readers if this post bored you a bit, I tried to keep it brief because I can talk/write about this stuff and just Christianity in general forever because it fascinates me and is something I'm passionate about. But I do try normally try to keep this blog neutral since it's mainly a writing and book blog. So, if you did read this post, thanks for sticking with me! Feel free to leave any of your thoughts in the comments.❤️😉

Happy Writing,


Y'ALL I FINISHED MY FIRST POV IN MY WIP // 20 Facts about Alex Anson

***Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to the pictures, all credit to those who are due credit***

I've finished the first draft of Alex's POV for my book. Two more POVs to go.

^^Me rn, it's also late and I'm on that weird (but amazing) writing high I always get after long periods of writing, but I'm extremely, extremely happy. 

So, in celebration of this moment, I am writing this post RIGHT. NOW.

Will it make sense when I wake up in the morning? Probably not, but whatever.

I've decided to share 20 facts about Alex, not all of these are said explicitly in the book, but they're all true, so. Meet Alex:

1. Alex is a quiet person, even after he feels comfortable around you he will still prefer to listen rather than speak.

2. Music is one of his favorite things, although he tends to be silent about his love for it, he secretly writes songs and quietly listens to his music.

3. His full name is Alex Nathaniel Anson and he's fifteen-years-old.

4. He's always been more of an anxious person. He'll overthink everything to the point of making himself sick at times, the polar opposite of his upbeat older sister, Piper.

5. He doesn't really have any friends because he tends to stay away from most people out of shyness and fear of them disliking him.

6. Alex doesn't pay a lot of attention in his classes, instead, he works on his song lyrics in a spiral he always keeps in his backpack.

7. He hates glazed doughnuts but absolutely adores powdered doughnuts.

8. He has a lot of emotions but has a hard time expressing them out loud.

9. Alex is a dog person.

10. His songs are very personal, they're like his diary, he puts his emotions into words, and he would be horrified if anyone read them without his consent.

11. He keeps all of his songs in a box underneath his bed hidden beneath a blanket, this is not a secret to Piper, but he thinks it is.

12. He is brilliant in English and very much a teacher's pet, although he doesn't realize it.

13. Loud people secretly scare and intimidate him.

14. He often feels unwanted and out of place in this world.

15. Alex hates to think about his future because it makes him anxious.

16. He feels dull and unambitious a lot due to no. 15.

17. When he's not writing songs or listening to them, he likes to take walks, especially at dusk because he likes the mood and the fact that the town he lives in is quieting down.

19. He likes oversized hoodies because he feels safe in them, which makes him feel stupid so this is not a well-known fact, although it's not hard to tell that he likes them because he typically wears one all the time.

20. His singing voice is really good, but he doesn't sing in front of people due to the fear of discovering he's terrible.

This was fun! Now, I'm going to try to get some sleep.
What do y'all think?
Tell me a random fact about your character. 

Happy Writing,


Guess what I got... (+ bookish pics)

Yep! I finally got a nice camera, it is the most expensive thing I've ever purchased so far, but it was worth it. 

So, expect more pictures taken by yours truly on here, although I'm still going to be using Unsplash for most of my blog post headers. 

Hopefully, my end of the month wrap-up's aesthetics will be better now! And I'm looking forward to taking lots of bookish pictures. 

I'm still working on my #skills, hopefully, I'll improve as time goes on!Anyways, I was just excited and wanted to post about this!! <3


My Characters Aesthetics in Song Lyrics

***Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to the pictures, all credit to those who are due credit***

Y'all know I love my characters and I love music and aesthetics, so let's combine all three, shall we?

P.S. I have something super exciting to share with y'all at the end of this post (but don't skip forward! I see you with your finger on the scroll button!! 😉). 

Anyways, let the post began, and I don't own any of these images, so all rights to the models, photographers, etc. 

//I've been thinking too much, help me-TOP//

//Tears on my face I can't take it. If lonely is a taste then it's all that I'm tasting-NF//

//We may fall but we'll keep on going. We may break but we won't stay broken. Through the cracks in the road, the flowers grow-Alice Kristiansen//

//Need a place to hide, but I can't find one near. Wanna feel alive, outside I can fight my fear-Billie Eilish//

//It felt so sweet, it felt so strong. It made me feel like I belonged, and all the sadness inside me, melted away like I was free-Marina and the Diamonds//

//Three little birds sat on my window, and they told me I don't need to worry.-Corinne Rae//

//But no one else heard, the weight of your words. Or felt the effect that they have on my mind-Birdy//

//Sorry I could be so blind, didn't mean to leave you, and all of the things that we had behind-Halsey//

//There's method in my madness, there's no logic in your sadness. You don't gain a single thing from misery-Lauren Aquilina//

//Losing him was blue like I'd never known. Missing him was dark gray all alone. Forgetting him was like trying to know somebody you never met-Taylor Swift//


//I've told you time and time again, I'm not as think as you drunk I am-P!atD//

//The truth behind these four walls, becomes clear when they’re gone. Looking in, feel their stares, our mistakes in open air-The Sweeplings//

//Caught up in so many things, taking the cure, but feeling the pain. Holding it in. Losing yourself. Staying alive, but you’re broken-Natalie Taylor//

//Where are my feelings?  I no longer feel things. I know I should-NF//

//And I'm too tired to pretend, that I'm strong enough on my own-Allman Brown//
Soooo, are y'all ready for the super exciting news?! 

Here it is:

Lilah, the lovely, super sweet, and extremely talented blogger and songwriter wrote a song for Alex since he's a songwriter. 

I needed a song for Alex to write in my book, but alas! I am not the best poet ever, but I was so thankful when Lilah agreed when I asked her for help, and she wrote me these amazing lines, which I'll be using and crediting her for in my book. 

And today, I am going to share it with you guys! 

Ahhhhhh, seriously, I'm still fangirling over this!! Lilah did such an amazing job, please go over to her blog and give her all the love, because she is just wonderful and so so talented. <3

What lyrics describe your characters? 
Feel free to steal this post idea if you want! I thought about making it a tag, but ehhh. 
Isn't Lilah talented?

Happy Writing, 


Shower Thoughts // a short story

It's been a while since I wrote any short stories, although I went through this phase where they were alllll I wrote when I was younger, now I'm mostly working on my WIPs and stuff like that.

But, the other day I had an idea for a short story and decided it would be a nice break to just play around with writing one. 

Thus, here we are, I hope y'all enjoy and that you guys don't find it terrible! 

          Dark hair runs down my bare back and chest as hot water pelts me. Mist fills the bathroom as the overpowering, yet comforting smell of oatmeal and lemon soap fills the air--it is a childhood scent, one that reeks of nostalgia and bubble baths, while playing with rubber duckies and Winnie-the-Pooh cups. It should be relaxing, yet my body is tense. 

I force myself to breathe. This is just a shower.

It shouldn’t be this hard.

Making myself reach for the comb, sitting dejectedly on the side, I watch as water rolls off its grey plastic like tears, and I realize that my shoulders are shaking.

The best thing about taking a shower is that there’s no proof of crying.
Red puffy face? Hot water.
I’m trembling? Must be dehydrated.
Blood-shot eyes? Darn shampoo. 

My hair is tangled. Tangled from lying in bed all day. Tangled from tossing and turning restlessly. Tangled from being pulled in frustration and worry. Tangled from a week of neglecting to wash or comb it. I rake my comb through it, pulling, yanking, tugging. The tangles refuse to give, so I settle.

Clean tangled hair is a step up from dirty tangled hair, isn’t it?

My razor stares down at me, the blades glinting in the steamy air. Before I know it, my hand is grasping the handle as I slather shampoo and soap onto my legs.

There’s always something about a shower that steals your thoughts away. I think about who I was a year ago. I was strong, independent, confident. I knew what I wanted and how to get it. I thought I was invincible.

Oh, how the mighty fall.

There’s a sharp pain in my leg. I look down to see my razor pressed into my skin. My hand robotically pulls it up my leg, leaving bright angry red stripes. The razor falls from my fingers as I stare at my leg, watching the blood trickle down and get washed away by the water. Pain from the wound fades into a dull ache as I turn off the shower and step out.

I pull on my clothes not bothering to dry off, yanking my jeans on makes me hiss in pain. I glance back at my leg to see the spot already darkening from more than just water. Cursing under my breath, I stumble forward, throwing open the bathroom door and walking past the foggy bathroom mirror without a glance in its direction.

I know what I would see; a weary shell of a person, the washed-out version of who I use to be. I hate looking into my own eyes because I can see it, the sadness and the emptiness I feel. It’s a monster trying to crawl out of its cage, and when I look into my lifeless eyes, I know that someday it will escape. One day everything I feel will crawl its way out of my soul and up my throat. Its cry of anguish and anger over being contained for so long will be audible, piercing the air and shattering the image of happiness I’ve been able to put up for others.

I dread that day. 

But that day is not today, so I take a breath, step out into my room, and leave my shower thoughts behind.

Thoughts (besides shower thoughts, although those are always enlightening as well)?


What Happened in July (nothing, I'm boringggg)

Whoo! Can you believe July is already ending? I can't, it flew by so fast!

Two of my sisters reading my current wip. 

I'm still working on Alex's POV and it's going smoothly! 

'School is a nightmare even worse than a dream about my face getting bashed in, because unlike that dream, school is a reality. A reality that is always hard to face, but today I’d rather pull out my teeth one by one with a rusty pair of plyers than brave those cold halls.'

-I volunteered at another church camp, it was a ton of fun but exhausting! 

-I went to an old retro theater to watch the The Shining, which I'll talk about later.

-My family and I went to Galveston and I took pictures, which you can read about here

-I got bored one day and wrote two pages of song titles off the top of my head, on sale for $6.99 (just kidding!)

-I got a free book from the library about The Lord of the Rings!!!
*squeals* I love it. <3

That one day when your makeup looks decent.😅

I'm considering becoming a beautician, my mom always says I should think about it and I do love makeup, not to mention I have no real future plans at this moment. Also, I'm the only girl I know who fangirls over eyeshadow palettes...

Total Temptation palette by Maybelline

Could be because I'm homeschooled so half of the girls I know barely wear makeup, lol.

Thoughts: Arnie had the quickest transformation from nerd to jerk// Leigh was an idiot why did everyone think she was so smart??// That one scene was uncomfortable to watch with my parents, whyyy// Dennis was pretty cool though

-47 Meters Down
Thoughts: Aesthetically pretty// The beginning was boring, can we skip to the sharks???// That plot twist, OH MY GOODNESS!!!

-The Others
Thoughts: The overall mood was intriguing//  Wow I did not see that plot twist coming how did I miss that????? 

-The Shining
Thoughts: Finally watching this, yay!// Jack is strangely charismatic// I feel like I shouldn't be holding back laughter// Danny is so cute, awww// Wendy is adorable too// That nude scene though, my eyesssss// REDRUM// ummmm, what is going on// what are those weird things doing// actually I don't want to know// whoo that is terrifying// 

My mom's thoughts: why am I here// I don't even like horror// I'm only watching this because I love you 

I didn't read a lot of good books this month, but here are a few that I enjoyed: 

Mini reviews:

Welcome to the Dark House: A very twisted read with unlikable characters, but the ending had me spinning. 

Cult: A refreshing book about the struggles of a Christian teen.

Falling for You: The perfect case of don't judge a book by its cover--a modern day Pollyanna story. 

That was my month! :D

How was your month?

Happy Writing,

What's Hot This Month: