Don't Hold Back

Hey, there.

I know that you, the one reading this post, have been hurt before.

I know that there was a time when a close friend failed to be a friend to you, I know you've cried. I know there has been or that there will be a time in your life where you will say to yourself "I can't do this anymore."

How do I know? 

Because I've been there, and I've seen people there.

Proverbs 18:19 says that "a brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city: and their contentions are like the bars of a castle." 

And I know that at one point someone offended you and you closed them off because of the pain they caused whether on accident or on purpose. 

I want you to know that you are beautiful. Everyone is beautiful in some way, and you are too. 

You are not worthless, you are priceless

I wish I could tell you that everyone you'll meet will find you beautiful.

I wish I could say that everyone would fall in love with the small gap between your two front teeth, with the way your eyes crinkle up when you smile, the way you laugh a little too hard and trust a little too much.

And you should know that there will be people who you will be able to tell your stories to and they'll look at you in wonder because here you are today. You will be a light to someone one day, whether you realize it or not.

I wish I could say that everyone will look at you and see the beauty in not only your strengths but your flaws.

But if I said all that, I would be lying.

There will be people who will look at your scars and jerk back in disgust.

There will be people who will hear your story and judge you for your past.

There will be people who will take one look at you and decide that you're not enough for them.

There will be people who will walk away from you because they can't understand what you're going through.

There will be people who simply can't emotionally deal with you, and that's okay.

In the grand scheme of things, those people won't matter, the people that will truly matter to you are the ones who stayed.

But that's actually not my main point. 

Maybe so far in this post, you've been nodding along, thinking of exs and old friends, but I want to ask you something, a question that hit me hard a few days ago...

How many times have you been that person?

How many times have you seen someone's scars whether physical or emotional and jerked back in disgust?

How many times have you judged someone for their background?

How many times have you disregarded someone because they were different than you?

How many times have you failed to be there for people in need?

How many times have you been the one to leave a friend in need? 

How many times have you failed to see the beauty in someone?

How many times have you only focused on the flaws people have? 

How many times have you caused someone to push you away because you hurt them?

I know that I've personally done all of the above before.^

And most likely you have too, whether on accident or on purpose.

I believe we can do better, because we all know how it feels to have someone reject you, to be judged.

 I am a strong believer that our pain can help heal others, and that in helping others we end up helping ourselves as well.

Let's not let judgment hold us back from friends, strangers, and family who are in need.


  1. This is such a valuable post, Gray. So important. Thank you for sharing your heart <3

  2. Woah. This post hit close to home for me. Thank you for writing these words, I needed to read them! <3

  3. *applause* This was so great, Gray - thanks for sharing <3

  4. Strong words that grip me and definitely resonate with my soul. Maybe God is trying to teach me something right now, through your words, because I feel as though I needed this really badly.

    Thank you. <3

    1. I'm glad then that He used me in that way. Thank you for your words and for reading. <3

  5. Wow, I love how you just *bam* turned this post right into our faces. One of the reasons I don't regret my pain is because it's made me more aware to not cause it, too. I don't think I've ever been /as/ cruel as some people, but even a little bit is too much and I'm striving hard to be a better friend to everyone in my life. It is hard, but I know it's what God wants of us - to love all people more than ourselves.

    Also, I really felt you described me here:
    "I wish I could say that everyone would fall in love with the small gap between your two front teeth, with the way your eyes crinkle up when you smile, the way you laugh a little too hard and trust a little too much."
    haha, I've always loved my tooth gap and didn't realize it was unfashionable until a couple years ago. And I found out when another friend pointed at a model on a magazine and said, "Wow, she has a tooth gap!"


    1. It turned in my face as well while writing it, I had already thought it out but it still hurt like a slap in the face. >.< People are hard, and letting people in is hard because some people will take advantage of that and hurt you, but in the end sometimes people need someone to let them in and to actually care. <3

      Huh, that wasn't intentional, but I'm glad it worked out! I like tooth gapes, I was sad to get braces because it meant I would loose my, but I was forced to because I had an impacted molar, lol. :/

  6. Wow, this was such a good way to start my morning. I mean, it hurt, but it was a good kind of pain. I don't want to be that person, though I know I have been.
    Thank you for the reminder.

    1. Sorry that it hurt, but I'm glad it helped. I've been that person too. :(

  7. That was very convicting, but so true. It reminded me of what Proverbs 18:24 says: "A man who has friends must himself be friendly." It hurts when others turn away from us, but we have to examine ourselves in the same light. I know I've been guilty of that.

    1. Yes! I love that verse as well, it's so true. <3 I've been guilty of it as well.

  8. I'm afraid I sound generic when I respond to posts like this. I'm never sure how to word my comment to SHOW that I've been impacted. But just know that I have been impacted. This is such an important and heart-hitting message. Thank you so much for sharing! <3

    Lila @ The Red-Hooded Writer

    1. No elaborate comments needed. <3 Thank you so much for reading!

  9. This is all so true. I tell myself to love people more and then I get so impatient and annoyed when people don't act the way I wish they would. I see the ugly in them instead of a heart that might need reached out to. Something I'm always trying to work on!


    1. Same here, I'm really working on where and how I focus. We should all work towards it. <33

  10. Wow, I had never thought of this. This is really making me think, and I really want to thank you for that! <3

  11. This is such a beautiful, thought-provoking post. Thank you so much for this! <3

  12. <3 <3 <3 This was really beautiful and definitely something I needed to hear :)


  13. We need this in our lives, Gray. Thank you ❤️

  14. Very true! I want to always try to be kind and understanding, sometimes I fail. I want to keep learning and not to give up on friends.


    1. We all fail sometimes, the important thing is to learn from it. <33

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