4/2/19

This Was Harder Than I Thought it Would Be


I never realized how hard it was before, but then I wasn't a Christian before.

They say ignorance is bliss and it was.

Being able to slack off and become luke-warm when it came to studying the Bible, praising God, and going to church was easy.

Being ignorant of how in sin I was was easy. 

Being able to say "well, we all believe in Jesus and that's all that really matters" was easy. 

Being under the mindset of "once saved, always saved" was easy.

Being able to save "covered by grace" without actually repenting and changing was easy.

Being able to turn on the radio and not worry about dishonoring God with instruments mixed with praise was easy.


Being able to fully tell people my testimony without them looking at me like I've joined a cult was easy.

Being able to tell people what church I went to without them starting a full-fledged "Well, you know what I believe-" rant/statement on me was easy.  

Being able to walk into a store and walk out with clothes and not worry about being modest was easy. 

Being able to go to dances instead of dealing with questions on "why won't you go this time?" was easy. 

Being ignorant of euphemisms and not flinching every time someone said one was easy. 

Being able to shrug off the fact that a friend wasn't saved because "they'd probably come to Jesus at one point" was easy. 


Being a Christian is hard.

Following Jesus is hard.

Living faithfully is hard.

Standing up for what I believe in even when I feel like I am standing alone is hard.

Cutting out words I never thought were wrong before is hard.

Having friends cease to talk to you because you decided to obey the Bible is hard

Being constantly asked loaded questions by people who only want to see you fail at answering is hard

Realizing so many people that you thought were with you aren't is hard

But I know where I am going, and I wouldn't have it any other way. 


Wherein ye greatly rejoice, though now for a season, if need be, ye are in heaviness through manifold temptations:
 That the trial of your faith, being much more precious than of gold that perisheth, though it be tried with fire, might be found unto praise and honour and glory at the appearing of Jesus Christ:
Whom having not seen, ye love; in whom, though now ye see him not, yet believing, ye rejoice with joy unspeakable and full of glory:
Receiving the end of your faith, even the salvation of your souls. -1 Peter 1:6-9

27 comments:

  1. <3 Your faith journey is so beautiful, Gray, and so encouraging to read about. Thank you for sharing boldly. You inspire me to pray for God to increase my own courage and faith.

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    1. Thank you so much for your encouraging words. <33

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  2. <3 Yes, I totally agree with Faith! It is hard, but you are such an inspiration. <3

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  3. Oh, Gray. Every one of your posts is heartfelt and lovely. Standing up for what you believe in and always worrying about whether you're doing the right thing is so. darn. hard. I'll be praying for you, and I wish you the best journey in your exploration of what is true and beautiful!

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    1. It means so much to read that, thank you. <3 And thanks for your prayers.

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  4. Oh, goodness. I love this post! We never talk about how HARD it is to be Christian and stand up for our faith. <33

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    1. Thanks, Nicole! It's not easy in the slightest.

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  5. Beautiful honesty here. Keep going, girl!!

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  6. I love this post, Gray!! I love how you're so real. <333

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  7. I just love how candid you are; you don't sugarcoat the struggles of being a Christian but it's so clear that it's all worth it to you. I think I needed this post as a reminder that if things have been too easy, maybe I'm not living up to God's expectations of me, and maybe I need to try a little harder to shine my light. <3

    theonesthatreallymatter.blogspot.com

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    1. Thank you so much for your encouragement. <3 It's so worth it--He is everything. We can always try harder to seek and follow God's will for sure. <3

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    2. Thank you so much for your words, Emily. <3 It's so worth it--He is everything. We can always strive harder and seek and follow God's word. There's always more to learn and do for sure. <33

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  8. You have a beautiful heart, and I'm inspired by your courage for Him. Keep fighting the good fight! xx

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  9. Thank you for being so vulnerable and real ,it's so wonderful to meet someone else who is . It's made me realize that maybe I haven't been living completely up to God's standards for me.Thank you for challenging us with your posts !

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    1. Thank you too for your realness, Makayla! It's sorely needed this day and age. <3 We can always work harder, seek and you will find. <33

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  10. Yes it is hard, yet so worth it! Great post!

    astorydetective.blogspot.com

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  11. You are correct ... it is hard. So hard at times ... I feel like I'm about to step onto a really hard path with some things that are happening in my life right now, and it's scary. But this is inspirational.

    Also, love the bit about euphemisms, as that's a pet peeve of mine ;p

    keturahskorner.blogspot.com

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    1. I'll be praying for you, Keturah. You're not alone. <33

      Ugh, same here, I'm glad I'm not the only one.

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  12. It is hard. That is usually a sign that you are doing something right.
    This was really encouraging to read. :)

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    1. Your comment was encouraging to read, thank you. <3

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