5/13/19

On authenticity and finding your worth


Comparison is the thief of joy, and insecurity creates a landslide effect of comparing myself to others, which bleeds into everything else. 

It steals my joy--my sense of individuality, because who am I if I'm nowhere as good as anyone else in my head?























Every day I wonder, who am I? Who do I want to become?

When the real question is: who does the Lord want me to be? Who am I to Him, and the other souls He has placed in my life?


"You struggle with your identity," my therapist once said, "are you being your authentic self?"

I didn't know how to answer that, because I don't know who my authentic self is. However, I'm learning that no one really does and that it's okay. 

It's okay to be the loud person in the room with the booming laugh but it's also okay to feel quiet, to be the listener in the loud crowd.  

Because being authentic doesn't mean never changing, it means never becoming fake. It doesn't mean always having the same emotion, or always wanting the same thing, it means never pretending that you feel a different way than you actually do.


I don't always know who I fully am, sometimes I forget, sometimes it slips through my fingers and falls into the cracks of my insecurity. 

But being authentic doesn't rely on that if someone is a normally happy person they shouldn't pretend to be happy when they're sad because that's the usual emotion they display. 

Being authentic is being honest.

Being honest is saying, "I'm not okay" or "I'm just a little sad today", being honest is being authentic.


I don't always know who I am, and sometimes I lose myself in the cacophony of others, but I will always try to be the best person I can be, and that's authentic. 

I can't promise that I'll be happy tomorrow, but I can promise that I'll love you just the same. 

Being authentic doesn't mean never changing, it means never making yourself change or stay the same. It means never hiding who you are. 

Just be you. 
Laugh at the lame jokes you find funny, jump in piles of leaves, sing along to the songs you love, let yourself breathe and stop worrying about what others will think if you skip along the sidewalk. 

But most importantly: be who God wants you to be. 

Who does He want you to be?
  • A child of God, John 1:12, 1 John 3:1-2
  • Loving, Romans 15:7
  • United, 1 Corin 6:17
  • New, Romans 6:6
  • In His image, Gen 1:27
  • In the body of Christ, 1 Corin 12:27
  • Chosen, 1 Peter 2:9
  • One in Christ, Gal 3:27-28
  • Honoring to God and yourself, 1 Corin 6:19-20
  •  Hidden in Christ, Col 3:1-3
And so, so much more.


Dear reader, 

Even in the midsts of this world's confusion, never forget your worth. 


 I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. -Psalm 139:14

29 comments:

  1. Wow, Gray. You knew exactly what I needed to hear today. Thank you. <333

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    1. I'm glad this helped, thank you so much for reading. Praying for you, Nicole! Life is tough but so are you!!<33

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  2. Amazing post .. love how you're turning this identity thing right where it needs to be ... toward growth and God. Also, all the pictures in this post are AMAZING AND SO ARTISTIC!

    KETURAHSKORNER.BLOGSPOT.COM

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  3. It makes me so happy that even though you've struggled with identity in the past, you're turning all those feelings into truth! I can't say I don't fall into that pitfall of self-comparison and identity dysmorphia, but I can say that reading this really meant a lot to me. I've changed a lot since last year and I've grown stronger and bolder, but I look at a lot of people around me and they could really use this, as well as myself. Thanks for that and for those aesthetics. :)

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    1. I'm a work in progress, but I am happy! I'm so glad you're growing stronger, keep on, friend. <333

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    2. I'm so glad you're happy, and always remember that we're always stronger than we think we are! I'm always here if you need someone to talk to. :)

      Oh, and I found this and thought you'd appreciate it!
      "I was supposed to be a city with busy streets and twinkling lights, but I wanted to be a house, full of warm sunlight and dried flowers gracing it's vases. I'm neither, today, but a hollow skeleton of progress where everyday something builds and collapses. I am happier in this [a work in progress] <3

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  4. UM YES! I needed this post in my life. *Hugs*

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  5. This is beautiful. I needed this. <3 😭

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  6. Thank you so much for writing this! This is something I needed to be reminded of. And yes! Being honest is so important because I think it shows that we find our identity in God rather than in men.

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  7. So true! Thanks for sharing! I needed this reminder rn! <3
    -Brooklyne

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  8. Amen. <3333 Your heart is so pure, Gray. And you have such steel in your nerves to share these truths with the world. I needed this, thank you ever so much!! <33

    ~ Lily Cat (Boots) | lilycatscountrygirlconfessions.blogspot.com

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    1. Aww, thank you so much for your kind words! I'm so glad this could help even if it was a tiny bit. <33

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  9. I love this post. It's so needed by girls like me. <3

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    1. <3 <3 Girls like you are strong and amazing, never forget that. <333

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  10. Thank you for this beautiful post, Gray. <3

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  11. So true! It is hard not to compare. And be true. Great post!

    Oxoxo

    astorydetective.blogspot.com

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  12. Wow. I needed this today. Thank you so much for sharing. <333

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  13. Beautiful post, Gray! I can be such a people-pleaser, I sometimes do things simply because I think people would like it, when they'd rather just have the real me (if that makes any sense). But I've loved following your journey. P)

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    1. That does make sense, but I'm sure they'd rather know the real you. <33
      ^_^

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  14. I love this post! It's beautiful!
    <3

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