6/10/19

Dear Reader: You're Not Ugly



I cry a lot. Mostly about things that are worth crying about, but I'm also super vain and insecure so I find myself crying about the way I look a fair amount of the time. 

I know it's stupid, and I know that I am very blessed to have this body of mine, however, I still struggle to think I'm pretty or even average. Often times I feel very ugly, especially when compared to others, which is one of my pitfalls. 


God created me this way for a reason. He gave me pale skin, freckles, and curly hair. He made me short and curvier. It wasn't a mistake because God doesn't make mistakes. 

That's what I have to tell myself daily, and that's what I'm here to tell you.

God created you this way for a reason. 
Think of someone who is very close to you or someone you admire and fill in the blanks:

"I like _______ because they are __________."

Did you say because they are good looking or because they are skinny and could be on the cover on a magazine?

No? Well, then you understand that beauty is only skin deep. Attractiveness, while great and desirable, isn't everything at all. And if anyone only measures your beauty on your outward appearance, then my friend, they're the ugly ones. 


Listen, I can't promise that you're the most attractive person on the planet, but I can promise that no matter what there will always be people who will see your true beauty and think of you as lovely.

They'll see the way you smile when you're happy.

The way your eyes light up when you talk about things you love.

The jokes you make, the way you laugh, the way you love.

There will be people who will adore you for these things and so so much more.

Be you. Be the best person you can be. And obey the Lord and live according to His word.

You can't get more beautiful.

And that's what truly matters, no matter what.





Pics of a makeup-free, very tired, and slightly broken out Gray Marie, because authenticity matters and this is me and my imperfectly perfect face and hair.










42 comments:

  1. Ah, I love this post so much, Gray!!! Thank you so much for sharing this, because I think this is a super needed message... especially to young girls and women. So many times I find myself comparing and struggling with body image, but God made me unique and original and it's time to embrace that.
    Because we are all fearfully and wonderfully made! So anyway, thank you for this post, and this reminder!! <3
    -Brooklyne

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    1. Thank you! It's alarming how superficial everything is, never forget your worth. <3

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  2. Your awesome! Everyone goes through this... in one way or the other. I get surprised when people say I'm pretty. I guess I think I'm normal or sometimes not pretty. Its okay though, we are who God made us to be; we need to be beautiful on the inside that is what God looks at.
    Sweet post Gray!

    astorydetective.blogspot.com

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    1. Awww, right back at you! <3 Very true, and you are so pretty inside and out, Rakayle!! <33

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  3. You so clearly and concisely set the perspective straight in what you said here. And the post-it in the mirror is great.
    I hesitate to compliment girls on appearance, not primarily because I don't want it taken the wrong way, but because I want them to know I value them for who they are, not how they look. So I search for ways to show that. I struggle with that decision sometimes because I know many who feel like you mentioned at the beginning: insecure and fearful that they're too ugly to be liked, and I wish I could find the right words to blow away that lie.
    You did a great job of that here.
    (And if you're wondering why some random guy showed up on your blog, I've been lurking here for maybe a month and a half. I'm a friend of Mikayla Holman's and she always has one of your posts linked on her monthly highlights. So it's her fault. =) )

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    1. Thank you!
      I always find that while I do appreciate being complimented on my appearance, compliments on my personality mean more to me. But just be genuine, if you think someone is pretty and an amazing singer: tell them. Too many compliments go unspoken when we should all be building others up.
      Mikayla! I love her and her blog, any friend of her's is most welcomed here. :)
      Thanks for stopping by!

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  4. Lovely message! More girls need to hear this. <3

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  5. <3 <3 <3 <3
    your heart is beautiful and so are you.
    <3 <3 <3 <3

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  6. Wow this is so encouraging Gray! Thank you so much for this! I completely 100% understand what you feel because Self Conciseness (Is that how you spell it? ^-^ Lol) is hard struggle in my life too!

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    1. I'm glad this encouraged you!
      I think you meant "self-consciousness", it's a hard word to get right, I personally can never spell "Definitely" correctly on the first try. :P
      But I relate, I really struggle with that as well. You're beautiful, Brianna, but more importantly, you're so kind and funny, I remember always thinking that when I saw you at PGM.

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    2. Lol yea that's what I meant!
      Aww thank you! You are too! That rly means a lot to me Gray! I always thought you were a sweet girl always shining for God too!

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    3. Aw, you're a treasured friend! <3

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  7. I love this so much!! You’re such a lovely girl and your perspective is something that not many people have ❤️

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    1. Aww, thank you, Paige! Your heart is lovely <3

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  8. This is the truth all the models in the magazines need to hear, and what should be encouraged to everyone instead of the lies about the shapes of our bodies and our physical attractiveness. I feel like it's said, but very subtly not ever encouraged\or really believed. Instead, the opposite of truth is encouraged and it's so demoralizing! And its so sad because we're all so unique and our own beauties are so diverse that trying to push it all into one "look" is so destructive. Thanks for spreading the truth, Gray. We all need to hear it. <3 Your soul is beautiful and so are you!

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    1. "If tear drops could be bottled, there'd be swimming pools filled by models."-Billie Eilish Idontwannabeyouanymore

      That's so true! Things would be so boring if we were all the same, there are so many different types of beauty. <3
      Thanks, you're so sweet, LHE!!

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  9. LOVE THIS SO MUCH GIRL! It is so raw and real and beautiful -- just like you. <3 <3 <3 I struggle a lot with my image and you inspire me. <3

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    1. Never forget how precious you are in the eyes of the Lord, Kara!
      You are an amazing, creative, and beautiful person and your ability to create worlds and characters that feel real caught me off guard when I read your book. And that's not even the surface level of you!

      Thank you, your words as always, mean so much. <3

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  10. Thank you so much for this post!!! I needed it badly. :-) <333

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    1. It's something we all need pounded into our heads everyday! You're worth so much, my beautiful and awesome friend! <3

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  11. More people definitely need to see this!! i know i struggle with this. i don't really like myself, i never really have. But this was encouraging to read Gray. Thanks for this :)

    Lia

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    1. I just wanted to chime in here! I've struggled in that area, more than I would have liked, and it is such a waste of time to worry about those kinds of things. Recently, I just gave it to God and decided to accept who i am. :) You're beautifully and wonderfully made in the image of God, and more than that, you're a MASTERPIECE. Would you look at a masterpiece and say, "that's an ugly piece of work". No, of course not! The painter painstakingly made you how he wanted you to be, and if you should have looked or had the characteristics of someone else, (and if He didn't see you as good enough), than you wouldn't be who you are today. But the world needs more of you, so just be you and let go of the insecurities, you'll miss out on so much life that way! <3 Remember who you are. ;) -someone who cares

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    2. I second LHE, she said it way better than I could ever <3 Perfectly and wonderfully made

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  12. First, I LOVE YOUR SMILE!
    Second, I relate. It's hard being a curvy girl in a world of stick-figure tv actresses.
    Third, I'm starting to love the fact I have curves. I think it's how women are supposed to look ;)
    Fourth, I've always thought you are adorable, so never cry over your looks!
    Fifth, that first meme is sooo cute!

    keturahskorner.blogspot.com

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    1. Awww, thank you!! <3
      I wouldn't go as far to say it's how women are suppose to look, since I know many thin and slender women, but it's a normal body type that shouldn't be shamed along with any other type. <3

      <3 <3 Thanks, Keturah!

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  13. Thanks for the encouragement! :-)

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  14. Hey Gray! I wrestle with the same thing you do. I think choosing to believe the truth is the hardest thing for me; sure you hear "you're beautiful" and "wonderfully made" and I know that. But the message has to take a long 18 inch journey from my head to my heart. Believing it is a whole new journey and a constant thing I have to accept. Just a reminder you're not alone and we're all kinda navigating this truth of how we are made! and that we're beautiful! :)

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    1. Yes, it's a hard message to remember! Best of luck on your journey, friend, you 100% aren't alone <3 <3 <3

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  15. WHY is this so inspiring Gray??? This is truly a fabulous post and I think that today's world really needs this message. <3 <3

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  16. Love this post!! Everyone always needs to hear this. I know I do. <3

    theonesthatreallymatter.blogspot.com

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  17. This might or might not have brought tears to my eyes.

    I'm not really insecure about what I look like, so I don't know how it feels, but my heart hurts for those of you who don't think you're beautiful.

    Keep thinking about this post Gray, keep remembering you're beautiful. Because every word in this post is true, and every word describes you and all the other girls struggling with insecurity.

    Love ya!! <3

    ~ Lily Cat (Boots) | lilycatscountrygirlconfessions.blogspot.com

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    1. <3

      I'm glad you aren't insecure, I wish more people weren't.
      Thank you for your words, love you too!!

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  18. <3 <3 <3 This is beautiful, Gray! I was having a hard day and this really helped. <3 You are so amazing!!!!

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    1. Aww, thanks, MC! You're so sweet, I'm glad it helped. <3 <3

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