9/2/19

Negativity + Stress = A Rut For Yours Truly







I tend to be a negative person.

This is something I am working on; not letting stress and my insecurities control me. 

I tend to focus on the little things rather than the big picture when it comes to myself. I forget the good and only see the bad.

Awkward conversation? Forget all the other good conversations I’ve had and all the friends I’ve made, I am clearly a terrible conversationalist. A babbling idiot. The most awkward and unlikable person to ever grace planet earth, thank you very much.

I’m behind on a subject? Who cares about all of the other subjects I’m ahead on and all of the classes I’m making straight A’s in, it’s obvious that I’m stupid. The worst at school. An airhead who is good for nothing when it comes to academia.

Bad picture of myself? All of the good pictures of myself are now irrelevant because it is abundantly evident that I am ugly. I am the ugliest. I am the queen of frumpiness and double chins.










It's ridiculous, I realize, to judge myself solely based on my bad days when I wouldn't do that to anyone else without trying to stop. 

I am ashamed of my behavior last week, I let myself get stressed out over tiny details, I beat myself down, and held myself back. 

I am done with behaving that way. Of course, I am bound to slip back into this old bad habit, but this time around I'm going to work harder.

I'm going to work harder to remember that the fall is not what matters, the important thing is that no matter what I get back up again. 




Just a rambling, I hope your week is fantastic! 










Also: I was experimenting with these photos, how do you like this style?


37 comments:

  1. I can so relate to this post, Gray. Thank you so much for the reminder...I needed to hear it. <3 <3 <3

    (also, the new photo style is BEAUTIFUL! whatever style you choose, your photos will always be gorgeous :D)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I do the same thing! It's so easy to be hard on yourself.

    And I love the photos! :D

    theonesthatreallymatter.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  3. (Ooo, I love the pictures! They're so pretty!)

    I love this post so much, Gray. I've been feeling really stressed myself this week, so your wise words are exactly what I need to hear as I go into this week. <3

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you!

      I hope we both feel less stressed, it is hard to get into the swing of things.

      Delete
  4. I can relate to this! Praying for you, girl! <3
    -Brooklyne

    ReplyDelete
  5. This made me laugh and inspired me all at the same time. I can so relate. Thank you for posting this, Gray!

    ReplyDelete
  6. I relate to this so much -- when you get down and really think about it, it's funny how one terrible thing can so easily cancel out a million good ones. XOXO

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is funny how we let the unimportant things rule our attitudes so often. Thanks for your thoughts!

      Delete
  7. Everybody, I promise it gets better than this if you just work on it. I had nearly forgotten that I had a long streak where I felt like this all the time. If you want to change bad enough, want to see yourself the way God sees you, the habit will slowly fade away and be replaced by something beautiful.

    ReplyDelete
  8. The pictures are beautiful. Sometimes I read your posts just because the photography lured me in. It's a unique feature of your blog, and I always appreciate them. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Aw, thank you so much! It made my day to read this. <3

      Delete
  9. This is so good! I can relate with this (a lil to much...)

    ReplyDelete
  10. I can relate... I'm working on it just like you. Keep shining!

    astordetective.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  11. SO RELATABLE GRAY. You're not alone. <33
    Pictures are absolutely gorgeous. <33

    ReplyDelete
  12. You think you're the queen of the double chin? Wait til you see what I can do with my chins, lol...cameras and I don't get along...

    ReplyDelete
  13. I struggle with the EXACT SAME thinking. You are absolutely not alone. I'll pray for you, Gray. <3

    Love the pics!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. I feel that you get me Gray, and that makes me happy :) I have struggled with this thinking for as long as i can remember. I'm trying to get better, but some days are better than others. I'm praying for you!! And I love the pictures!

    ReplyDelete
  15. I, too, am a really negative person, but I hope that you are doing okay!
    Some days are better than others, and we have to hold on to those days and refuse to let go!
    - Emma :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. Hey, I think you're far from alone. I feel like a very negative, bitter person half the time. But you know, the more you smile and the more you try and the more you rely on God, the easier it gets ;)
    Keep on, Gray!

    MB: keturahskorner.blogspot.com
    PB: thegirlwhodoesntexist.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So true! Thank you for your wise words, Keturah!

      Delete
  17. Oooofff, self esteem is really important. Honestly, I've really felt my self esteem rise by listening to Gary Vaynerchuk on a daily basis. Sure he has some language issues, but over-all his content has been so so helpful in my personal life. This was a nice post, which I think most all of us can relate to on various levels. May I ask if your realization came over time? Or just suddenly hit you like a ten ton Godzilla fossil ? :)

    Evan

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, it is! That's so interesting, I'll check him out.

      I've always kind of known this about me and that I need to snap out of it, but this year I was hit with it again.

      Delete
  18. I struggle with negativity too, I've been working on it though.
    I love the photos!!!

    ReplyDelete

Hi, wonderful human bean.
I am so happy that you took time out of your day to share your thoughts with me! :)
But please,
• Be kind • Be respectful • No swearing •
I will do my best to reply!